"She Needs Everything Repeated"

By Laura Lurns · Reviewed by Philip Weaver · Last reviewed 2026-10-01

Is it her hearing?

In our view, needing things said again and again is worth a hearing check. Ask your child's doctor whether hearing has been checked recently. A child who cannot hear well needs that found.

A standard hearing test checks whether a sound was heard. It does not ask what happens to the sound after that. That includes following one voice in a noisy room, and telling similar sounds apart. It also includes holding what was just said long enough to use it. Those are different questions. A clear hearing test does not answer them.

When the room is busy

Some children hear every word when you are close. In a busy room, they lose your voice. That is not always tuning out. The voice they need is there. It may not stand out from the rest of the room.

Some children cannot pick the teacher's voice out of the room. Other children cannot keep their attention on the task. From the front of the class, both can look inattentive. One thing to notice is what changes when the room goes quiet. No sign we hold has been shown to tell the two apart.

Holding the words in mind

Working memory means holding something in mind while you use it. Following a two-part instruction is one example. Keeping a number in your head while you work with it is another. So is remembering the start of your own sentence. A child who loses a two-part instruction may follow a one-part instruction perfectly. Working memory is one of the jobs running at once. It is not the single thing that explains the rest.

What to check

In our view, the first step is usually to work out what is hard. Our position is that a lost skill goes to a doctor first.

Have hearing and vision checked.

What to try at home

Give instructions close by, with the room quiet, and write them down.

Reduce the load while the skill is built. Write instructions down as well as saying them. Give one step at a time. Ask for a printed copy instead of copying from the board. None of that is cheating. Our position is that reducing the load does not stop the skill being built.

We hold no study that tests the steps on this page. That is a gap in what we hold, not a finding that they do not work.

Our page on processing difficulties has more.

When to ask for help

Each of these is a reason to ask for help on its own.

• Little change, even with steady practice and good teaching.
• Schoolwork well below what school expects.
• A teacher who raises a concern about learning.
• Extreme upset about schoolwork.
• Complete avoidance of school or learning.
• Hopelessness about learning.
• Sadness or worry that lasts.
• Significant delays in speech, language or motor development.
• A skill that was there and has gone. Our position is that a lost skill goes to a doctor first, not a tutor.

Start with the teacher. Say what you are seeing at home, and what you have tried. Beyond the teacher, the right person depends on what it turns out to be about. If the work is too hard, someone who works on that school skill. If worry or mood is the thing, someone who works with children's mental health. In our view, delays in speech, language or movement are worth raising with your child's doctor. In our view, if you are worried enough to ask, a professional evaluation is worth asking about.

Any talk of hurting themselves is a same-day call to your doctor or a crisis line.